I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
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