Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
