oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
