im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
