So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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