So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
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the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
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Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?