I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
