I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Found the puke drawer
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
