Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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