I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize