i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize