Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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