Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Randomize
