JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
