the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
