the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
