If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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