we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
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