Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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