so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
