Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize