I cannot find my penis.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
