I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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