I should be sponsored by Trojan
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
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