the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Randomize