oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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