Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
We need to rekindle our bromance
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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