My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize