True but thats because hes a fetus.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
