WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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