So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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