Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
that's an acceptable place to lick
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Randomize