I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
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