Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Randomize
