I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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