For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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