So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
