I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize