shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize