she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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