i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
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