If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
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