Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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