Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize