I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
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