So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize