she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
