Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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