Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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