Betty ford says i'm here all night
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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