I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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