we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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